❝We can't always escape our pasts, Bella.❞
Bella woke up not knowing anything about her past. She will unlock her past while trying to solve her friend's mysterious parent's murder. She moved to the wicked Frotin Town and met the mysterious I...
ʙᴇʟʟᴀ Sᴄᴏᴛᴛ ᴛʀᴀᴠᴇʀs; "I'm broken, from endless night sadness."
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9th of November
Standing on the edge of my new bedroom's window, I let my brown eyes take the new glimpse of this hell of a town I just moved in. They told me Frotin Town is a beautiful place. "Oh, Abella you'll love it there a lot! The night view, the stars, and the calmness, and the weather!" My stepmother didn't even take a moment to shut up about it. Even though it was so different than New York, yet there's something entirely different about this town, something odd in this city. My body lost balance at the edge, should I fall today? Or should I not? Should I? These suicidal thoughts crept to me every night in this incredible town. I contemplated the night sky. The bright stars. The full moon was illuminating every window of the neighborhood. I peeked down, thinking what bone would break if I, indeed, fell.
The cool sea breeze scent greeted me. The coldness hit my face. "Don't over exaggerate Abella! You'll do fine." Lucinda, my friend, had told me. But now she's nothing but a memory I never want to visit inside my mind. And yet Lucinda you broke our promise, "I'll never forget you, I'll always write you! I'll visit." Where are you now? Where were you at the time I needed you the most. Some friends are buried inside memories, and some that our eyes will never forget, and some friends that don't leave our minds. And some that live inside hearts. I snorted at the reminder of this word. Friends. But yet you displeased me, Lucinda. And many did. But you were the last person I had to say my goodbyes to.
I loved New-York, like a lot, I couldn't accept the fact at that time that we might be relocating again, into a different city, a different town, to new people, and eventually, into another new, different life. I loved the people back there; our neighbors were hospitable enough to make me feel right at home, except the fact that my stepmother, Beatrix, always pulled arguments and combats between the neighbors, they still liked me and welcomed me. They were like the second family to me. The family I wished I always had. It's funny that when you find the right person to feel comfortable with, life suddenly creates the distances. Life suddenly creates those hills and mountains that take you far away from your beloved people.
It's the night of the full moon, my favorite night of the month, but the clouds did a great job of covering my moonlight tonight. The sound of thunder tingled my ears, and the first drop of rain started slipping. It rained a lot here in Frotin. Rain did make me peaceful; I found peace and solstice within it. A Pluviophile. At least raindrops are brave; they are never afraid of falling. They are never afraid of breaking apart into forms when they contact with the ground. A lighting illuminated the sky, causing me to lose my balance again, causing my heart to pump blood faster to my blood vessels. I wish I was brave in falling. Falling.
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I yield back to my room. I gazed at the mirror; I couldn't quite comprehend it, I turned seventeen today. Oh, how time races! I examined my brown eyes, my waist length dark brown hair. Who are you, Abella? Who are you? No one even remembered my birthday, because my caring, awesome father is always busy, and my stepmother Beatrix, well, she's a whole lot different case. I took a deep sigh. How can someone feel this alien with someone supposed to be a family with? How can I be distanced from someone that I'm, physically, so close with?
My Father and Beatrix insisted on moving here, and I confess that I'm so depressed that we moved away from New York, because life there was much easier. At least I won't be a new school girl again. We moved three times for the past four years, from a town to another. They appeared so unsatisfied where ever they go. Screw them. At each time I had to say a goodbye to someone I know that I'll never even see or meet again, It felt like losing a piece of me. Because they were people that didn't break me apart. But gathered my broken pieces and fixed me. Set me with their love, their happiness, and peace. Tears slid down my cheek before I even realized I was crying. My heartfelt rage, sadness, hopelessness. Why was I chosen to live this life? Why? I clenched my fist harder. Resisted the urge of sobbing and laying down all night thinking about how my life change bit by bit through time.
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I just think and worry too much.
Sometimes I just have to close some doors. Not because of how great these doors are, or even the arrogance that I feel. Because as I can see, they don't lead me anywhere.
I blink, and looked steadily at myself again, gazing at myself looking and realizing how strong I am, how strong I've been all these years to resist not driving insane with Beatrix or my cold-blooded father.
"What if I didn't even have a chance to make friends? Am I going to be lonely all over again?" I whispered to myself. Who needs friends anyways? Sometimes when you're always there for them, they take you for granted because they think you will always stay with them no matter what. They always used me for granted anyways. Why can't I just skip this whole studying thing and go to the part where I'm a billionaire? For a moment I realized that I don't need someone to complete the other missing half of me. But I know I was lying to myself.
